leo

the signs in front of someone they secretly hate

atruegentlemanthief , ,

aries: looks bored, tries to escape every ten seconds
taurus: laughs nervously at everything in an attempt to be nice, gets tired after five minutes and then just fake-smiles and nods
gemini: doesn’t even try to be interested, says “haha yeah” a lot in a tone that lacks any emotion
cancer: smiles weakly and avoids conversation as much as possible
leo: ignores the person bothering them, is sarcastic while smiling a lot, tries to be nice but doesn’t rly give a damn
virgo: pretends the other person isn’t speaking and looks disgusted
libra: fake-smiles through the entire thing OR doesn’t smile at all and makes sure the person knows how pathetic he/she is
scorpio: smiles and laughs too much, doesn’t try to maintain the conversation
sagittarius: literally everything they say is sarcastic
capricorn: tries to be friendly but ends up being awkward
aquarius: becomes extremely quiet, when they do speak it is to say something offensive/demeaning in a very subtle (yet scathing) manner
pisces: shrugs in response to everything, looks extremely bored, completely ignores the person and says “whatever” from time to time

know your gays

atruegentlemanthief , ,

aries: the controlling charming gay
taurus: the quiet sensual gay
gemini: the busy flirty gay
cancer: the caring emotional gay
leo: the dramatic creative gay
virgo: the critical smart gay
libra: the romantic indecisive gay
scorpio: the needy passionate gay
sagittarius: the funny wanderlust gay
capricorn: the ambitieus responsible gay
aquarius: the unique friendly gay
pisces: the dreamy complicated gay

~The Signs & Obscure Words~

atruegentlemanthief , ,

glittertomb:

Aries~ onism (n.) ~ the frustration of being stuck in just one body that inhabits only one place at a time; possessing the ability to live many unique lives, but limited to this one.

Taurus~ pauciloquent (adj.) ~ one who utters few words but offers great depths; divulging the essence of one’s thoughts without superfluous speech.

Gemini~ cosmogyral (adj.) ~ whirling around the universe; spiraling through the galaxies in a playful freefall.

Cancer~ quaintrelle (n.) ~ one who emphasizes a life of passion, expressed through personal style, leisurely pastimes, charm, and cultivation of life’s pleasures.

Leo~ coruscate (v.) ~ to reflect brilliantly; to sparkle, glimmer, or gleam; to have a flashy or showy technique or style.

Virgo~ sapiosexual (n.) ~ one who is attracted to intelligence in others; one who falls in love with the beauty of the human mind.

Libra~ aesthete (n.) ~ a person with a special appreciation for art, beauty, & aesthetics; who takes time to set and enjoy a particular mood.

Scorpio~ opia (n.) ~ the intensity of looking someone in the eye who is staring straight back into you, their eyes glittering and bottomless, which can leave you feeling vulnerable.

Sagittarius~ degrassé (adj.) ~ simultaneously entranced and unsettled by the vastness of the universe, causing a desire for both reverence and wanderlust.

Capricorn~ sprezzatura (n.) ~ the ability to make one’s actions seem effortless, to carefully and cleverly hide suffering, to disguise one’s true desire, feeling, or meaning, either to help others or protect oneself.

Aquarius~ ambeddo (n.) ~ a melancholic trance in which you become absorbed in sensory details— clouds of cream swirling in your coffee, drops of dew on the window— reawakening awareness of the haunting, ephemeral beauty of life.

Pisces~ nefelibata (n.) ~ “cloudwalker”; one who lives in the clouds of their own imagination or dreams, or one who does not obey the conventions of art, literature, or society.

the signs as Bob’s Burgers quotes

atruegentlemanthief , ,

Aries: My life is more difficult than anyone else on the planet. And yes, I’m including starving children, so don’t ask.
Taurus: If you need me, I’ll be on the floor. Dying.
Gemini: Summer is awful. There’s too much pressure to enjoy yourself.
Cancer: Mommy doesn’t get drunk. She just has fun.
Leo: I got a tool to remove security tags! Next Christmas is on me!
Virgo: Ooh, mini croissants! No matter what I say, stop me when I’ve had sixteen.
Libra: Was it obvious I don’t care?
Scorpio: I’m no hero. I put my bra on one boob at a time like everyone else.
Sagittarius: What is this feeling I’m feeling right now? It’s like I’m sad for another person? Is that a thing? AM I GOING CRAZY?
Capricorn: Okay, fine. But I’m gonna complain the whole time.
Aquarius: Hey, daytime whiskey, wanna meet my CD collection?
Pisces: I don’t need a boy to pay attention to me. I’ll pay attention to myself.

The signs on a bad day

atruegentlemanthief , , ,

Aries: easily irritated, aggressive, jealous, needs their freedom and space
Taurus: doesn’t give a shit about anything, hard to talk to, stubborn
Gemini: easily depressed, questions everything, insecurity, fickle
Cancer: wants to be alone, uncommunicative, competitive
Leo: criticizes everything, melodramatic, feels alone
Virgo: bad attitude, self-pitying, freaks out easily, very lazy
Libra: manipulative, dishonest, cold, sarcastic, nonchalant
Scorpio: explosive, revengeful, secretive, obsessive
Sagittarius: reckless, sarcastic, flaky, extremely harsh
Capricorn: feeling attacked, bossy, criticizes everyone and everything
Aquarius: too opinionated, wants to be alone, detached, guarded
Pisces: easily frustrated, out of touch with reality, gullible

Signs on valentines day

atruegentlemanthief , , ,

Aries: probably sleeping
Taurus: crying
Gemini: waiting for the 17th so they can buy out all the clearance candy at walmart
Cancer: complaining
Leo: at some party sucking someone off probably
Virgo: over does it with everything valentines day related. No mercy.
Libra: dying
Scorpio: probably playing some sex game like that one dirty dice thing
Sagittarius: waiting for the 18th to have a chocolate eating contest with gemini and getting a stomach ache afterwards
Capricorn: probably getting the handjob from leo
Aquarius: swooning over gemini
Pisces: swooning over a guy and acting like a total stalker

How the signs kiss

atruegentlemanthief ,

Aries: aggressive and forceful, like damn guys
Taurus: sensual and they probably taste like chocolate
Gemini: cute little pecks, aww
Cancer: soft but a bit aggressive and will probably pull your hair
Leo: passionate but they might bite your lip btw
Virgo: perfectionist, they put alot of work in their kisses
Libra: teasing and enjoyable, they probably taste like chocolate too
Scorpio: engulfing, so practice holding your breath alot ok
Sagittarius: excitable and will probably grab your ass so heads up

Capricorn: lusty and really touchy feely with their hands
Aquarius: interesting…. Just interesting… You will not forget it.
Pisces: nervous but meaningful, but sometimes they might get so nervous they won’t know what to do.

Skyrim zodiac 100% accurate

atruegentlemanthief , ,

Aries: the bitchass dragon that refuses to land and fight fair
Taurus: a mudcrab pretending to be a rock
Gemini: that quest where you get drunk with Sanguine and wake up in Markarth
Cancer: that bowl you accidentally picked up when you meant to grab the alchemy ingredient
Leo: that dog in Riverwood that’s named Stump
Virgo: Brynjolf’s accent
Libra: the sound that nirnroot makes
Scorpio: that one little girl in Whiterun who wants to fight everyone
Sagittarius: the wabbajack
Capricorn: that inexplicable need to try and jump up mountains instead of using the designated path
Aquarius: the bards that don’t sing but instead randomly whip out a drum
Pisces: that scatterbrained court wizard in Riften